By way of Hilde I found the Guilded Lilies: Grown Women Playing Games, and through the Guidled Lilies I found New Game Plus and a survey on women who play world of Warcraft. This qualifies as a good day's catch on the net!
I found myself getting involved in the gamer's comments, some of their experiences were revolting. But some of it may be our own fault for beign too accepting. In one guild the other players happened to use the word rape - as in "we totally raped them in the battleground, it was great fun." When I pointed out that the words "rape" and "fun" did not belong in the same sentence, there was a long akward silence on the guild channel, and the word was then never used again in my presence. Now, they knew I was a grown woman, no little gamer chick, and that probably made it a lot easier for me to not worry too much about the reaction if they disliked me speaking up. But I did get my share of respect when I pointed out that they were disrespectful, and they were wonderful companions for playing a game despite their occasional thoughtless choice of words.